WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Randomize
