she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Hippo gnu deer
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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