I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
