I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Randomize
