I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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