i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
