is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize