when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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