Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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