Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
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