Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
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