I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize