Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
