I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Randomize
