Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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