Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i will never coherently bang her
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I'm at about main and main street
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
