I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
