I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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