Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
