You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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