I showed him my bush... on skype.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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