i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
