Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Randomize
