do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Need sex. Gaining weight.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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