You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Randomize
