Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
