Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
