very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
