moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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