He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
