me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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