he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
