Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(904): View more from Florida

I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.

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(509): View more from Washington

I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.

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(917): View more from New York City

she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.

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(541): View more from Oregon

And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor

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(309): View more from Illinois

I'd suck anything for a pizza right now

Fav 42 5699 2014
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(816): View more from Missouri

we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring

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(708): View more from Illinois

if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again

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(239): View more from Florida

I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.

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(856): View more from New Jersey

If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.

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