Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
