I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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