so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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