Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
So much Jack, so little girl.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
