So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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