I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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