I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
