Come see our sink grown plant.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
