I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
