you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
