Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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