How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
operation have a gay friend backfired
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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