What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
