Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Michael Bay diarrhea
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
