Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Randomize
