Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
