I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
