Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
