i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
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