Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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