Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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